probabilityfields

It’s World Cup season and you know what that means. Right, it’s time for us who know nothing about soccer, sorry, football, to watch carefully and cheer when everyone else does so as to appear cultured. Seriously though, I think soccer is sweet. But the viewer has to learn how to watch it, not just the rules, and Spanish announcers (serious World Cup fans watch Telemundo), the viewer has to adjust to the giant field. S/he must learn to focus on the tiny little man and the intricate movements of his feet. That’s where the excitement is…apparently. I still expect a goal from every posession, and as such, I am consistently disappointed, but I’m learning.

Jesse: So everyone’s cheering for Ecuador right?
Owen: Ecuador’s not playing in this game.
Jesse: Yeah, but for the whole thing.
Beau: No way, man. Brazil.
Jesse: Ecuador can beat Brazil.
Beau: Do you know how many Brazilians will die if Brazil doesn’t win?
Jesse: How many?
Beau: Like, a brazilian Brazilians. Do you have any idea how many a brazilian is?
Owen: I wish I had a brazilian dollars.
Jesse: Who plays at nine thousand feet? Ecuador.
Beau: Yeah, but they also play at zero degrees latitude. Germany’s gotta be at like forty or forty-five latitude. It’s a whole different ball game there.